That Dec 04 & This Dec 06

Just a while ago I was going through the files, word documents etc etc in my ‘my documents’ folder in C drive. To see what I have been saving, which documents I currently need or may need in near future or which files I don’t need anymore, I decided to open up every file and see the material into it. It’s then I found this notepad file containing a dozen questions. Though I am not able to recall which source I saved this questionnaire from nor do I remember which purpose it was meant for.

This is the questionnaire I am here talking about. Guess it must have been for some evaluation that what kinda person you are like or where you lie on some scale of numerous classifications.

However the mark just before the particular option in this notepad file reminds me of my responses to the respective questions when I actually saw them for the first time. Though I am here, making them in bold for the purpose of better visibility in case if you got any vision problems ! However you immediately need to see a doctor then .See how good advisor I am.Well I also don’t restore since when this questions series has been in my folder. But thanks to the properties option which tells, it was last modified on Saturday, December 04, 2004 12:50:18 PM. So after reading my responses of that time I could not help but wondered how I was like then.


1. Your mantra can best be described as:

- I am unique.
I do everything the right way.
I need to succeed.
I must help others.
I need to understand the world.
I am affectionate and skeptical.
I am at peace.
I must be strong.
I am happy and open to new things.


2. What kind of kid were you?

You read a lot and did well in school
You liked to please your parents and teacher
-You always took a leadership role in things
You were super hyper and dreaming of freedom
You were popular with other kids
You had a best friend who you were inseperable with
You felt like you never quite fit in
You were independent - to the point of being a loner
You felt ignored a lot... like what you wanted wasn't important


3. What's your biggest fault?

Sometimes you can be manipulative
You're a bit narcissistic
-Being too much of a perfectionist
You've got a masochistic streak
You tend to be a bit passive sometimes
You tend to be excessive with things you enjoy
You are too aggressive at times
People think you're quite weird
You tend to get depressed easily


4. What best describes you?

Cheerful
Truth-seeking
Laid back
Different
Helpful
Perfect
Successful
Invincible
- Responsible

5. On most days, you feel:

Stable and secure
Driven and motivated
Agreeable and receptive
Expressive and dramatic
- Generous and caring
Busy and happy
Confident and decisive
Focused and capable
Principled and purposeful


6. If you were guilty of a deadly sin, it would be:

Anger
Fear
Avarice
Envy
Gluttony
Pride
Deceit
Sloth
- Lust

7. What are you most afraid of?

Having no identity
Being imperfect or bad
- Being worthless
Being unloved or unwanted
Being helpless or incapable
Not having support or help
Losing someone you care about
Other people controlling you
Feeling deprived or in pain


8. You would be most likely to say:

"I prefer to figure things out on my own."
"I know I'm right - why should I have to compromise?"
"I have always been successful."
"I always see the bright side of things."
"Did that help at all?"
"All my life, I've questioned my own ability."
- "I seem to feel things more deeply than others."
"I can't really think of a time when I was afraid."
"My life just kind of fell together, and in a very nice way."


9. When you're stressed, you:

Get really bossy
Tend to veg out and get spacey
Tend to get moody and pity yourself
- Go into overdrive, pushing ahead
Become suspicious of those around you
Become picky and demanding
Withdraw and avoid people
Get impractical and hyper
Tend to want to help everyone but yourself


10. People fall in love with you because:

You're a ton of fun to be around
You teach them all sorts of new things
You're easy to get along with
You make them feel unique and special
You're very caring
You show them the vision of a perfect relationship
You're great at moving a relationship along
You'll protect them until the end
- You are very committed

11. In most of your past relationships, you've:

Gotten very settled with one or two people.
Set goals for yourself as well as the direction of the relationship.
Let the your partner make most of the decision
Had a lot of pain and hurt.
- Given as much time and attention as your partner needed
Always kept things light and fun.
Been known to start fights just to make up later.
Had trouble trusting and opening up.
Known exactly how you feel about things at all times


12. Someone who knows you real well might say that:

You are too critical
You are too practical and down to earth
- You are intelligent but distant
You are a drama queen (or king)
You seek adventure when you are in pain.
You act like the victim
You are impressed by status symbols
You'll do a lot to avoid confrontation
You think first and then act much later


And when a few minutes ago I re-scanned it, I could not help but putting the mark at other option in almost all questions. Its not that I no longer relate to my previous responses, its just that some other new choice dominates the previous one. Considering that I am bound to mark only one option here the new list goes…though at times I was in the dead heat between/among two(or more) alternatives.


1. Your mantra can best be described as:

I am unique.
I do everything the right way.
I need to succeed.
I must help others.
I need to understand the world.
I am affectionate and skeptical.
I am at peace.
I must be strong.
-I am happy and open to new things.

2. What kind of kid were you?

You read a lot and did well in school
You liked to please your parents and teacher
- You always took a leadership role in things
You were super hyper and dreaming of freedom
You were popular with other kids
You had a best friend who you were inseperable with
You felt like you never quite fit in
You were independent - to the point of being a loner
You felt ignored a lot... like what you wanted wasn't important


3. What's your biggest fault?

Sometimes you can be manipulative
You're a bit narcissistic
Being too much of a perfectionist
You've got a masochistic streak
You tend to be a bit passive sometimes
-You tend to be excessive with things you enjoy
You are too aggressive at times
People think you're quite weird
You tend to get depressed easily


4. What best describes you?

Cheerful
Truth-seeking
Laid back
Different
-Helpful
Perfect
Successful
Invincible
Responsible


5. On most days, you feel:

Stable and secure
Driven and motivated
Agreeable and receptive
Expressive and dramatic
Generous and caring
Busy and happy
-Confident and decisive
Focused and capable
Principled and purposeful


6. If you were guilty of a deadly sin, it would be:

Anger
Fear
Avarice
Envy
Gluttony
Pride
-Deceit
Sloth
Lust


7. What are you most afraid of?

Having no identity
Being imperfect or bad
Being worthless
-Being unloved or unwanted
Being helpless or incapable
Not having support or help
Losing someone you care about
Other people controlling you
Feeling deprived or in pain


8. You would be most likely to say:

"I prefer to figure things out on my own."
"I know I'm right - why should I have to compromise?"
"I have always been successful."
-"I always see the bright side of things."
"Did that help at all?"
"All my life, I've questioned my own ability."
"I seem to feel things more deeply than others."
"I can't really think of a time when I was afraid."
"My life just kind of fell together, and in a very nice way."


9. When you're stressed, you:

Get really bossy
Tend to veg out and get spacey
Tend to get moody and pity yourself
Go into overdrive, pushing ahead
-Become suspicious of those around you
Become picky and demanding
Withdraw and avoid people
Get impractical and hyper
Tend to want to help everyone but yourself


10. People fall in love with you because:

You're a ton of fun to be around
You teach them all sorts of new things
You're easy to get along with
You make them feel unique and special
-You're very caring
You show them the vision of a perfect relationship
You're great at moving a relationship along
You'll protect them until the end
You are very committed


11. In most of your past relationships, you've: (If I had one ! )

Gotten very settled with one or two people.
Set goals for yourself as well as the direction of the relationship.
Let the your partner make most of the decision
Had a lot of pain and hurt.
- Given as much time and attention as your partner needed
Always kept things light and fun.
Been known to start fights just to make up later.
Had trouble trusting and opening up.
Known exactly how you feel about things at all times


12. Someone who knows you real well might say that:

You are too critical
-You are too practical and down to earth
You are intelligent but distant
You are a drama queen (or king)
You seek adventure when you are in pain.
You act like the victim
You are impressed by status symbols
You'll do a lot to avoid confrontation
You think first and then act much later


No doubt sometimes things of past just simply make you wonder and think how much you have changed over the time. Believe me its so amusing to see yourself responding differently to the same situation but at the different points of time. Don’t we keep staring at our childhood photograph for a good stretch of time, wondering how we were like ‘then’ and how we got transformed into a different person of ‘now’ ? The same way I was smiling at myself questioning ‘hey anu, was it YOU who marked these answers ? ‘ .Because when I was going through them I found myself retorting to the same questions differently .Sure it must have got to do with our changed viewpoints, opinions, beliefs, judgments, ideas, convictions and the attitude towards life as a whole otherwise no reason I perceive of our having metamorphosed into a different individual over the time.

I don’t take any guarantee that I wont alter my answer some years or even months down the line. But yeah I do take guarantee that I will be same amused again seeing those modified answers. Really its so nice to see remodeled ‘you’, at different periods of time of the long journey. And guess what, how heartening it would be to see the kaleidoscope of various observations at one or other stage while you are on the verge of wrapping up this journey called life. Well try once for yourself and see the change if there is any, after some years or months or days down the line.
By the way have you encountered anything where your ‘now.’ and ‘then’ were different from each other in this regard ?

And yeah, Wish you all and your family a very happy and prosperous new year !!